The days are taking on a cool that signals winter is on its way, but it’s bright and clear this morning. It's reminiscent of one that passed just recently. The train rumbled across its bridge clickety-clack over the water while the sun cut a narrow hole through the gloom illuminating the buildings to a shimmery gloss. A lone tugboat made its way up the centre of the river rippling a serene triangular wake. So picturesque that words fail to accurately describe. I'll keep a snapshot in my head.
I inhale deeply in an effort to shake the cobwebs from my head. It feels as though I am walking through water, my body thick and heavy. I know that contributing to that heaviness is my reluctance to go to my destination. I should just get over it. I know really I should. i can't wish away my obligation.
I resolve to do the best that I can, as I do every day and the only part of my body whirring with activity is my brain, thoughts fleeting, returning and pressing up my skull waiting to be noticed. None of this should be concerning me until closer to the date. If it will happen at all. Will I get a job? What sort of job? Will I get an apartment? That I like? In an area I prefer? Will it allow pets so I can send for my wee Bijou?
Time to stop making excuses and get myself to the gym, work this all out with some working out. Two birds with one stone. Get my lumpy body back in shape and get some of this worry out of my head.